cant happen here....

Ok so this weekend has been fairly interesting...but i am hoping that next weekend will be better.

I got to see alot of pictures of Brenna when she was little and in high school. I have come to learn that we come from way different backgrounds....she had the life I only wish I had....seriously.....instead of being a pom pom....and a jock who is beautiful....I was the skater....punk....black sheep/outcast who is ugly.....so this is why i think she deserves better....and that i am not right for her.....she knows that and she doesnt see it the same way which is a good thing....but i dont know....she said something to me other day that was random but made me feel better.....she said she couldnt wait to get a house with me....yeah its going to be awhile but it will be interesting....i also saw a picture of her where she was wearing a michigan tshirt.....ha i had the same one....i think it is so weird that we came from such different backgrounds, yet we have so many of the same dreams and aspirations....we wanna live the same as the other....same type of house....same area of whatever state we end up in....kids....all of it....i just need to stop thinking so much and start trusting her....but after friday its hard....she found a bunch of papers that were from her and "him"....wedding stuff....she told me that they never planned anything....but she lied....and her excuse is that she forgot...so im beginning to think that they were planning an october wedding....which technically i was too...so dlksjglyhjlsjhljhl;fs.....

ok now that i am trying to find something loud to listen too....i have 2 hours before brenna will be done with work....i have had a really boring day....its horrible and i have to work at the station tonight so that will be boring too...grrr.....3 nights this week....it really sucks....but hopefully i can do hw the next 2....whatev....i had the kids this weekend...boys anyway....kaleb and kyle were both driving us nuts....not sure if it was them or us....we think both....they both made a mess in their pants....i mean come on...one is 7 and one is 5....and they got sick that night....fun fun....but next weekend ross said he will take kortnay....then brenna and i are heading out of town....KC here we come!!...we have it all planned...and the hotel we are staying at is amaziing....well the view is....there is an art gallery we are going to check out...than some improv comedy show where the audience wins prizes....we are excited...i just hope everything works out for us....oooh yeah i found some loud A7X to listen too....yay....

and brenna was the cutest baby!! the only thing is when i look at her pictures i wanna cry...i see her in a different way....something i dont think anyone could ever look at her....i see her as that little girl....someone who is so delicate.....idk...am i crazy?? yeah probably...

peace